Trevor writes:
It's been a particularly trying time in the last 10 days amongst those I am connected to, what with the needless killing of John Broome's elderly mother in an attack in their Boksburg home, the loss of Mirriam & Tito Zwane's son - Vuyo Zwane - in a tragic crash on Saturday morning, and the senseless killing of good friend Gary Joubert's son - Marc Joubert - in a Durban restaurant robbery on Saturday night.
It is so easy to have one's spirit crushed with this huge load of tragedy and pain affecting those so close to one, however yesterday my spirits were lifted sky-high at the incredibly moving memorial service for Vuyo Zwane at the Sacred Heart College in Observatory.
I have such deep admiration and respect for the humility and strength shown by the entire Zwane family at this deeply sad time for their family. My heart, as a father, went out to Tito as he spoke tenderly of arriving at the scene of the accident to witness every parent's nightmare unfolding in front of him.
Both Mirriam and Tito blew me away with their courage and smiling faces of thanks and hugs for everyone attending the refreshments hall at the end of the memorial.
I did not have the pleasure of meeting Vuyo (my being there to essentially to share support for Mirriam), but by the end of the service it was clear that this young man was a hugely influential cog in an incredible circle of family and friends.
I felt massively privileged to be able to share this insight into the amazing quality of people in Vuyo's life, and left thinking that there were people in that hall who could well make a big difference in society in memory of their close friend, son and brother.
I am hugely blessed to know someone like Mirriam Zwane - and to meet Tito Zwane - who are clearly at the influential hub of an amazing social network of family and friends. These are fine, fine people!
Rest in peace, Vuyo, I didn't know you... but you have left a clear and lasting impression in the manner that you lived your short life and so positively affected those around you. God bless you and your family & friends.
Regards
Trevor Nel - 011 - 705-2790 - www.innercircleforum.com
trevor@innercircleforum.com
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3 comments:
Hi Trevor
Like you I did not 'know' Vuyo, but I did meet him and was impressed by the young man that I met. He walked tall and proud, but had a sensitivity about him that beguiled his youth. It was clear that his mother, Mirriam was the most important person in his life.
I spent time on Friday afternoon with Mirriam, at her home. A great number of people milled around and Funiwe tried several times to get me to engage with them, to no avail. I was there first and foremost to see Mirriam and try and express my thoughts on her loss. Times like this, seem to serve no more than to bring my own losses back to me in a flood of memory. I find it excruciatingly difficult to put into words, the feelings in my heart.
Mirriam, in keeping in the tradition of her culture, met with a steady procession of people, paying their respects, in her bedroom. Many sank to their knees as she kissed them and hugged them and gave to them the strength that she herself so desperately needed. After paying my respects to her and chatting for a while, she joked about how it was 'tradionally correct for me to speak to her before meeting anyone else'. She was touched that I knew about the tradition - in all honesty I didn't - for me it was instinctive.
During the course of my time there, I too met Tito, and was touched to hear that he had 'heard all about' me. I met his mother who was clearly traumatised and suffering badly from asthma. I met Mirriam's mother, whose features are clearly to be seen in her daughter. Many of their mannerisms are also very similar.
The love and committment of the family was clearly evident as four generations mingled with each other, propped each other up and leant on each other from time to time.
Visitors were gladly received and made to feel welcome, and only a few words of loss were discussed, before other discussions started to take place. The family keep their hurt well hidden and clutched to their own hearts.
Over the almost two years that I have come to know Mirriam, I have come to know a little more about her than most of her acquaintences and am proud to call her friend.
She is an incredibly strong woman, who is very clearly in charge and in coontrol of her life. Mirriam is a tiny woman with a big heart. She is softly spoken, but carries her convictions and the beliefs of her heart on her sleeve.
She is deeply committed to making a change here in South Africa, and whilst others talk of the change that they would like to see happen - Mirriam quietly goes about making them happen.
Take care Zwane family and know that we are all thinking about you at this time.
Bless you Nikki... :-)
at times i wonder why the good people die
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